I wish that I didn’t care!

This flesh is a painful tragedy and at times it seems sooo unbearable. But it’s attached to me until death…

and I wish that I didn’t care

Having a recurrently hopeful dream of having grandparents. But realizing it’s never going to happen for me…

and I wish that I didn’t care

My past is ever before me and though it has been covered and forgiven it still it haunts me….

and I wish that I didn’t care

The desires of my heart are what I look forward to seeing manifest in my lifetime. But they appear out of reach…

and I wish that I didn’t care

I love to WORSHIP out-loud and with reckless abandon. But I get furious when believers refuse to express it…

and I wish that I didn’t care

Wanting to help people and to see them live life to the fullest is my personal ambition. But It’s a lonely place…

and I wish that I didn’t care

My physical flaws intrude my mind in a way that no one sees. But that truth always whispers to me constantly…

and I wish that I didn’t care

Hearing about that special get together with people I’m close with but finding out I wasn’t invited….

and I wish that I didn’t care

I get excited for the success of others. But I have to keep waiting and waiting for my turn yet keep applauding…

and I wish that I didn’t care

It kills me to be placed in a box of limitations. But I feel trapped in dead-end obligations that say work harder…

and I wish that I didn’t care

I want to know where I came from genealogically and if they look like me or even wonder about my existence too..

and I wish that I didn’t care

Social media is a demon that I am not bound by. But It still tears at my spirit to hear flattering words of the many so-called supporters yet witnessing what they REALLY feel through a status.

and I wish that I didn’t care

People love you to pieces and can’t tell you how much until they have driven you sooo much that one day the new car smell is gone…

and I wish that I didn’t care

When people say they are praying for me but I feel absolutely NOTHING….

and I wish that I didn’t care

When my spirit is sooo saddened and I have plenty to be thankful for But I become numb and resistant…

I wish that I didn’t care BUT I DO!

Yet with every prayer & petition…

With each rebuke…

I recognize that I am responsible for my own spiritual condition NO one else. Just me.

I have to make a choice to fight, to press, to LIVE and not let it overcome me.

So I cling to the hope of eternal life as my reward for my suffering.

I grab hold to my comforter during times that I cannot understand and through it all I realize that this is all for my good. I am being shaped and molded. Made to withstand more than I think I can.

These scriptures comes to mind just Now!

Philippians 4:8 New International Version (NIV)

 ⁸ Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

Laura, walk by faith not by sight….God says. Keep moving!

John 16:33 Good News Translation (GNT)

³³I have told you this so that you will have peace by being united to me. The world will make you suffer. But be brave! I have defeated the world!

Though I wish I didn’t care the reality is WHAT it IS!

Life hurts and I wish I didn’t care but I DO!

Yet, Jesus bruised, bled and died and bore the weight of the world on His shoulders so that I could spend eternity with Him.

The world wishes I didn’t care. But I DO!!

 

Life without Prayer

My life-without prayer-without connection to the one who created me…

Without the guidance, protection and peace provided through prayer…..

Without the strength, deliverance and understanding only attainable in prayer.

WITHOUT PRAYER.…

I will always doubt my ability to be more, to be capable of/or to be anything significant in life .

I will always succumb to bad news and disappointments and consider myself the victim yet never the VICTOR.

I will never overcome obstacles by pushing through them and allow God to develop my character through each one.

I will never find help to understand my past, present or future.

I will always find fault in everyone but myself.

And without it I will never come close to the heart of the one who loves me above all else.

Life without prayer leaves me with thoughts of resentment, bitterness and rage and then it tells me that the world owes me everything handed on a silver platter yet I pay nothing.

Life without prayer enslaves me to thoughts that force me to believe that I do not, cannot and will not ever matter.

Life without prayer says I was born this way and I should not have to change if I like it.

Life without prayer chokes me to a point that I cannot breathe in all of the good things God sends my way every minute of the day and if I do God get’s zero credit that’s just my luck or karma.

Life without prayer causes me to place social media (FB, Twitter) in priority over everything only to leave me lonely with a few likes here & there and followers who dare not care less.

Life without prayer shouts to my soul that you are not good enough to be invited because you are just not that important.

Life without prayer boosts my sensitivity to the things people say with their lips which builds unrealistic expectations.

Life without prayer kills every relationship with friends that are divinely sent to me and thrusts me into ones that only flatter me to get what they want from me.

Life without prayer traps me in selfishness leaving me blind to what matters to anyone else but me.

Without prayer I am rendered powerless…useless…purposeless.

I am stuck in place bound by my ever emotional ups and downs.

I am drawn to things that really don’t matter or make a difference at the end of the day.

Discernment and wisdom remain far from me and I am constantly over come by my lack of understanding.

Joy and laughter are scarce and drawn near to me on a temporary basis.

Life without prayer continues to spit out every encouraging word spoken to me or read by me that was meant to edify my spirit as a whole.

Life without prayer keeps my eyes fixed on the horizontal and never the vertical.

Life without prayer repels every blessing and good thing that was intended for me and headed in my direction.

Life without prayer intercepts the message God wants me to hear that is coming straight from HIS heart to mine.

Life without prayer cuts deeper into the very wounds from the past has etched into my skin. Sometimes it stops then starts over again.

Life without prayer keeps me feeling like I am not enough and that I must have what everyone else has just BECAUSE.

Life without prayer tells me to depend on phony people and insecure jobs that man provides which was never certain to begin with.

Life without prayer will always operate in the physical before EVER considering the spiritual.

Life without prayer……Life without prayer…OH MY GOD!

That’s for fools who trust in their money, their things and have no hope or need for the Grace of God. At least not until their world comes crashing down like the tower twins and their hearts are broken in half with only a pharmaceutical illusion of a cure.

That’s for the Godless one who laughs at me for all that I believe and chuckles every time I utter the words God is in CONTROL! and God is so Good even when have nothing.

That’s for those who call on the Lord when it’s convenient and use His Word to bring glory to themselves in public yet no conviction.

That’s for those who live happily on the outside while lightning flashes and thunder crashes on the inside destroying every thing their self-help books have built up.

That is for the boxer who loves to train and to fight but will never win.

That’s for the genius who believes that it is ridiculous to give and that it is luck to receive as a result.

That’s for those who think they will get away with unjust actions and behaviors toward other people.

That’s for the mouthy one who insists that gossip is only gossip if it comes back to you…

….and for the promiscuous ones who are sure it’s only cheating if you get caught.

That is for the individual who has resisted conviction so long that they become desensitized to the truth.

That is for the idiot who speaks first and apologizes after the damage has already been done.

That is for the one who likes the dark and everything it has to offer even though it leads nowhere.

That is for the one who has it all figured out. The one who forbids any ounce of the GOD of the Bible because of past “church folk” experiences or parental wounds and disappointments of those who misrepresented the ONLY ONE TRUE GOD!

LIFE WITHOUT PRAYER? Call it what you will…

THAT AIN’T FOR ME!             Jeremiah 33:3

Life is not proven by a warm body but there is nobody like the one who PRAYS!- Laura J

 

Health Revolution

Recently, as you all know, I began a huge healthy initiative to gain control over my health and physicality. I started off fantastic and I have gained strength and lost weight and unwanted fat.

My stopping point was when I became overwhelmingly fatigued with anemia that I developed during my past pregnancies. I had never felt so completely drained and I was forced to halt my daily “Insanity” workouts. By the end of each day I would crash and had no energy to get up in the mornings.

Though I did not have the ability to sustain a work out I still could not help but to pick up a weight and lift it at least a little each day. I also integrated “Raw Meal” fruit smoothies which produced a significant amount of energy and nutrition that urged me to educate myself more in regard to what I should be putting in my body.

I have watched several documentary videos that put my mind in a place that is eager to make a positive change in my health. One that will last a lifetime and promote longevity which, in turn, will allow me to live a full and joyous life. Who would not want that.

So how do I drink my Raw meal?

In a blender:

4 oz Frozen organic fruit (Strawberries, Bananas, Mangos, Blueberries)

6oz Tropical Organic (Low calorie) Juice or 3 oz juice 3 oz water

Blend until smooth

Then add one level cup (Scooper provided in the container of Raw Meal)

Blend until desired consistency

These can be drank daily to replace a meal or even 2 times a day replacing one meal and another as a snack.

When I found this in The Vitamin Shoppe my life was forever changed and vitality increased. I love this stuff.

Now, after being treated by my Hematologist, I feel better and my Iron supply is up and now I am ready to go.

Next week I will be starting a 14 day Fruits and Vegetable fast to ignite my metabolism and health all together. I am excited to get started and I will complete it while taking my Raw Meal and doing my 6 days a week routine of Insanity.

It’s time for a HEALTH REVOLUTION!

It’s gonna be great. I can’t wait…….JUST DO IT!

When we find and apply good nutrition, We welcome great health into our reality!

 

40 Days to Just Do it Like Nikey! (Week 2)

Today is Wednesday July 27th and I could not be happier. Remember, I told you all that I started a new medication that was supposed to counteract my inability to lose pounds. Well it worked!!!!

I am tremendously happy to announce that I have lost 10 solid pounds and I couldn’t be happier. I am excited to get to my short-term goal which is under 200 and knowing I only have 10 pounds to go makes me very happy.

This week has been a bit of a struggle only because the medicine I am taking was giving me headaches and making me not so up to working out which is a big no-no for me. However, the headaches are slowly subsiding. In addition to that, I found out that my iron level is tremendously low at a 4. This means I will need to have iron infusion again. Not sure what the cause is yet but after talking to my doctor today and her asking me where I am getting the energy to work out, I have no doubt that God is sustaining me.

She told me that people with iron levels as low as mine usually cannot work a job. Well, I am not just any woman. Now I will go and get my infusion but not worried one bit. I have been more tired than usual but even if I get up late for my workout I won’t compromise.

I say to myself “Laura get up, JUST DO IT!” and that has been getting me out of bed everyday.
This next week I will change-up my routine a bit because I tend to get bored really quickly so I will integrate another Insanity workout (Plyometrics and Core Cardio) to ensure I do not plateau and focus on my arms, waist and legs (My problem areas) to build the muscle and definition.

I felt my arms just the other day and BAM!!! Those suckas are poppin yo! I’m just sayin. Tricep dips, curls and presses everyday are making the difference. I keep packing on muscle so I have decreased to 5 day a week workouts instead of 6 because I don’t want to get bulky.

My meals have stayed the same but I may have to alter that just a bit to include more leafy greens for my iron. And believe it or not I have to make myself eat more because I found that I am not eating enough. Go figure. Either way slowly but surely I am slimming and trimming and I look forward to reaching each goal I have set for myself.

Life is good when we grab the bull by the horns. It’s my year and I am taking it!

Remember: If you use people to motivate you into action with your weight-loss journey when they stop you stop. Only God can sustain you ultimately so pray and let Him guide and sustain you. All things are possible when He is driving the bus. LOVE YALL!

 

40 Days to Just Do it Like Nikey! (Week 1)

Today is Tuesday July 19th and I am proud to announce my 1st 5 pounds has fled from me and I hope no one ever, ever, ever finds it.

Initially I was losing zero weight on the scale and then in the last 3 weeks I happened upon a solid 10 pound weight gain. UGH!!! You have got to be kidding me RIGHT?! And the very thing i dreaded was fast approaching….my doctors appointment.

I did not want to have to climb my bigNESS up on that scale so the MA could slide the scale marker over a notch and over again and oh one more time. YOU are killing me mannnnn!!!! LOL

Sorry, I am just expressing what it felt like and now you know why I dreaded it. But the light was shining when I finally got to see the doctor. Why? Because first off the last time I saw the doctor (April of last year 2010) I was much heavier so I got kudos during my visit for the first time ever in history and it felt GREAT!

In addition to that, I was prescribed a medication to go along with what I am already taking to treat my diabetes (which is crazy under control Yall WhooooHooo) and will counteract my inability to lose weight due to Insulin Resistance.

When I told her how often I was working out and what type of work out and what I was eating she could not help but to prescribe me this medication because she said “This is the only thing at this point that will help you get all of your weight off”. Of course it is not a miracle drug so don’t get excited. Instead it just means another shot added to the many already being administered each day. Oh well. It’s worth it.

So already I have noticed a difference and i am excited to see what happens after 40 days.

My Insanity Max Interval Sports training is remarkable and very intense. The results i am showing will be enhanced more and more in just a few weeks and then i will post picks but literally I can see a visual change and areas of my body are beginning to become more defined and sculpting the way i had only dreamed.

Needless to say, I won’t be stopping this anytime soon. More to come. Be blessed and remember…

JUST DO IT!!!!!

 

40 Days to Just Do it Like Nikey! (Day 1)

Who said we have to wait until Monday or the 1st day of the month to begin a weight-loss pursuit.
Today is my Day 1.

So what can I say except I have gotten sick and tired of being sick and tired.
I have been overweight since having my first child (China) and it was so worth the sacrifice but now it is time to get rid of ALL this baggage. I am exhausted just thinking about how long I have toted this stuff around.

Here is my fatty picture that I despise LOL

My husband would say “You’re not as big as you think you are” but actually the truth is I am not as thin as I think I am. When I go to the doctors office and they ask my weight and I say 115 instead of 215 they snicker under their breath and I feel so stupid. Why because in my mind I am not that heavy. When I look in the mirror I see all of the beautiful things and I really don’t pay attention to the overage if you will. LOL!

Until it’s time to take a shower is when reality hits me and I say to my self, what in the world is all of this. Seriously if people only knew what has been hidden. Man!!! Well enough is enough.

I have been working out again faithfully about 3 weeks (here and there on vacation) and in my 4th week I have decided to really go there. I am going to blog my days and inspire myself to lose 40lbs and begin with a 40 day kick-start to not only exercise but eating well and sharing my secrets, tips, dos and donts.

This morning I will hit up my Insanity work out for 50 minutes of core cardio and upper body and I am going to give it my all. Working out before I do anything else in the morning just works for me. At night I love to relax and I can’t do that if I have to be committed to working out.

Tip: I wear my workout clothes to bed so that when the alarm goes off at 6 I jump up put on my Nike’s and get to it. Bam! Shower, dress and then on with my day! I love this routine. It works

Starting weight 215 Goal weight after 40 days: 199
Unfortunately I am Insulin Resistant which means it is 10 times harder for me to lose weight than the average Joe so even working out for the past 3 weeks and eating well making better choices, I am still at the same weight I began with. But I won’t give up.

Ok so here is my meal plan for this week:

Breakfast 3 boiled eggs/1 sausage patty (it’s my yummy treat) Water and/or coffee

Lunch white meat chicken breast and veggies (Broccoli Normandy) enough for myself to have during lunch and a little extra when I start to crave crazy snack food.

DinnerHealthy Choice (not the brand) ie…salad, veggie burger, oat bran
The goal here is to abstain from consuming any snack foods or greasy fried fast foods and high carbs.
THE HEALTHIER CHOICE IS THE BEST CHOICE. I feel good when I eat good food. It’s that simple

I will permit myself 2 of my favorite snack foods and two indulgent (withing 400 cal) meals on SATURDAYS ONLY

This along with 50-60 minute 6 days per week work outs and lots of water
I alternate cardio and weight training every other day.
I am making this a lifestyle and not a diet. I want to be healthier inside and out.
I want to live well and a full spectrum life. If I eat crappy and do not engage in activity then my body will tell the mirror what I am doing. If we want better we must DO better!

Nothing will stop me. I am ready for success!

By the way my secret tip is eating lots of oat bran. Not only does it help regulate the digestive system health but it is a miracle at stopping cravings. I have it throughout my day.

More to come this week

I am faithful. I am committed. I am ALL that I can be for today. I am living NOW!

Just -Get up and GO!
Do- Something more than nothing
IT- Is only as hard as You make it

 

Great Expectation (An artists heart)

Psalm 62:5   My soul, wait thou in silence for God only; For my expectation is from HIM

As artists we ALL have the tendency to be very sensitive and that is probably the single most irritating part of being a writer and singer. You won’t find a large majority of people who are willing to admit that many times we are weighed down by our expectations of others and how they respond when we prompt. And more often than not I have found that most people are not very responsive to what does not involve them or benefit them immediately.

Feedback, whether positive, negative or indifferent, is good for an artist to grow and get better at what they do and is vital to the continuity of the music being produced. This seems to be a battle for most independent artists across the board.

So in order to conquer some mixed emotions I have about support and the expectations I have had in the past I want to expose it and remove the negative connotation attached to it for myself. I desire to have a clean conscience as I continue making music skillfully and in excellence to the Glory of God!

I have come to a place where I realize that there is nothing so special about me that the world should come to a screeching halt every-time I write or sing a song that stirs me and excites me. But everything IS special about the God who lives and moves within me.The world tells us to pop our collars and shake the haters off but why is that? Why do we spend so much time trying to identify haters? Do we think so HIGHLY of ourselves that we think everyone hates us because we are good a what we do? What kind of mindset is that to possess? I will tell you; We have all been there a or still reside there today.

I am wrong to expect attention, support, promotion or anything else from anyone other than God.  So I have arrived at this:

I would love to think that millions of people feel the way I do about the music I do. But if they don’t…Well life must go on.

I would love to think that support among artists is without favoritism and hidden motives. Truth is  that is just how it goes.

I don’t need 50,000 likes on my FB Page to be who I am. This is the standard of the world and not of God.

If no one ever buys my music or makes positive comments and shares with their friends…..

I have to be ok with that. I cannot force people to do what they have chosen not to do. I am ok to accept that.

There seems to be a very fine line between drawn between artists relationships and competition. Even though it should not be so in the Christian community, it all comes down to who’s better at riffs or who can blow or WHATEVER! We can’t just do what we do to bring glory to God and minister to HIS people right? No that would be to simple. We size each other up and in the back of our minds we say “He/She ain’t all that.”

It hurts when my expectations of those who say “I love your music” or those who are the closest to me cause excitement and then when what I assume will take place after that is nothing close to what I thought would happen and my disappointment causes me to doubt every word that people speak. So I think I set myself up each and every-time I allow myself to hold expectations of people where I am concerned.

The word SUPPORT has become a bitter taste in my mouth to the point where I sometimes despise the desire that bubbles inside for what I do because to do it effectively it requires SUPPORT! But then I think, if I couldn’t write or sing anymore it would kill me literally. Yes I would love to make a living doing what I love instead of what I MUST do but I cannot trust anyone other than God to either get me there and to help me to accept where I am now with contentment.

Support should not be something we beg people for or force them to do. As a matter of fact if that’s what it takes I don’t want it. It takes time but I am learning that I have to die to self daily so that I won’t look to my physical to give me peace in this venture. The physical man will always make us feel indifferent, disappointment, used and abused all in the same breath but I know Better!
When it comes down to it Jesus is THE FAMOUS ONE and I am just a tool being used to continue His work on earth.

If I thrive on the expectations I have of PEOPLE, I will always come up empty.

If I never make it to where I believe God is sending me,

If I am never recognized,

If no one cares to listen… though it breaks my heart to say….I want to be ok with that.

Although it would be wonderful to have everyone on board and willing to help get the word out about my music and my ministry.It’s NOT the most important thing in the world to me nor is it realistic thinking. If only ONE life is truly changed for the better by the gift God gave me …

I am going to practice keeping my mind in the right place and make all the necessary adjustments in this thing and just do what I DO consistently, humbly and effectively. No matter what, I can’t stop and I will NOT!

I am lowering my expectations of people in general and raising my expectations of myself as a servant and believer!

Finally, I’m going to ask God become My GREAT EXPECTATION!

 

Dare to Illuminate

It has come to my attention that my song and video, Illuminate, are being confused with a demonic movement called illuminati so as a BOLD believer in the only One True GOD I must clear the air. I am NOT nor will I ever be affiliated with any other belief system or authority other than the GOD of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob of the Bible.

I have done a little (not going to deep) research of this illuminati movement that has the Hollywood elite sold out to believe that they can have it all (fame, fortune and social status) only to find they lose their souls. I have seen many pop and hip hop idols (by the worlds standards) holding up triangular hand symbols and wearing clothing that represents this movement. Artist such as Jay Z, Drake, Beyonce, Kanye West, Lil Wayne, Eminem, Rhianna, Lady GaGa, renown atheletes and many more of the worlds richest icons can be found making theses gestures with their own hands, wearing labeled clothing (all seeing eye) and even photographed covering one eye or circling it (Thumb and index finger touching leaving the 3 fingers pointing out) symbolizing 666 the mark of the beast.

Side note: the symbol around my eye shown above is a heart symbolizing love and love alone. It was also taken long before the previously mentioned was brought to my attention.

There are things that men, women and children everywhere are mimicking without knowing that there is a deceptive meaning behind every detail of what they do and even within the lyrics of their songs and images in their videos.

Each of the above artist have a common theme that is associated with their individual character which is sex, pride, money and power. Whether it be for show and entertainment or not this is what is being communicated to the world through televisions, radios and internet channels across the world. If this is okay with you then there is no reason to continue reading.

I am not going to go too deep into this because I know who my God is and what He represents is love, joy, peace, goodness and kindness… Galations 5:22.

Here’s what I connect the illuminati mess with:

For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh and the lust of the eyes and the boastful pride of life, is not from the Father, but is from the world. 1 John 2:16  And in another translation says; Not everything that the world offers—physical gratification, greed, and extravagant lifestyles—comes from the Father. It comes from the world, and ¹⁷the world and its evil desires are passing away. But the person who does what God wants lives forever.

People ask me all of the time if I am shopping for a record deal. My answer will always be no. Unless it is on my own terms and I don’t have to alter my image and become what the industry wants and I don’t feel like I am selling myself for money. There is no amount of money that would make me sell out. PERIOD! I want to represent what is pure, wholesome and decent which is a quality that is deficient in the music industry today.

My whole point in this blog is to shine a light on what’s REALLY going on and it’s right before your eyes. Before you support know what you are supporting. Before you listen, know what it is you are listening too. Before you copy know what it is you are copying. And do some research, find the truth for yourself.

Illuminate (The title of my single and name of my album) by definition means: to provide or brighten with light. The only true light I believe in comes from God almighty Himself.

Matthew 5:16
“Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven.

                                                             ~”Illuminate” SHINE-YOUR-LIGHT! ~ Laura J

www.onlylauraj.com

 

What are you waiting for?

What are you waiting for?

Sooo, you get to a place in your life where you know something is missing. People who don’t know you from a hole in the wall confirm that God is trying to get your attention yet you continue ignoring the knock at the door.

What are you waiting for?

Is knowing that God wants your attention scary or a great comfort? Is not knowing the details of the reason why He is flagging you down making you fearful? What do you have to lose other than a life filled with things that lead to death, He is handing you an opportunity to live and NEVER die.

What are you waiting for?

The world offers you riches if you do what it wants, look the way it wants and if you say the things it wants you to. Yet everything this world offers will crumble, decay and lead to nothing. But we just can’t resist because we would rather be pretty, rich, famous and well liked. That feels good. Right?

You say to yourself, if I answer the call God has on my life, then I have to act a certain way, dress a certain way and have absolutely NO FUN! Wrong to a certain extent. Of course when we are associated with an organization we are required to maintain the integrity of what they stand for. We should wear the uniform to identify ourselves as employees, conduct ourselves responsibly and we must be careful of what we say. YES that is standard ethics 101!

But, to say I cannot be who I have been all along or I can’t have fun…this could not be further away from the truth.

I used to think drinking till I upchucked and getting into fights at the club was fun until it began to wear me down internally. I started to hate who I saw in the mirror.  A foul-mouthed, belligerent and disrespectful drunk. To the point where I had alcohol under my bed and a razor to my wrist. This could not be happiness, I thought to myself. I knew that I had done this LIFE thing completely wrong. I had no peace and of course, no joy. I was 22 when I realized I needed a SAVIOR! Waiting would only prolong the death of who I thought I was.

Today I love who I am and who I am becoming. I actually stand for something. I am a role model to my children and I believe in my heart that God is smiling down upon me with every effort I make to impact the world. The dark places of molestation, abuse, alcoholism (and the list goes on) an all that life used to destroy me no longer have its hands around my neck. I am free. I don’t have to look a certain way to be accepted and live for social networks and have a billion people LIKE my page or have the nicest house on the block or drive a nice car. These things used to matter to me and now they have NO power over me.

I am in a place where these things don’t motivate me to live and SALVATION is the best thing that could have happened to me. I never thought in a million years that I would be where I am today and I love it.

SO. Back to the question at hand. WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?

2 Corinthians 6:2 Says NOW is the day of SALVATION.  Tomorrow might not come to you so why wait? We can never be good enough on our own. Nothing we can do to get it right will work but Salvation will work for us and on our behalf.

Some say that they think being a good person is enough to get them to heaven BUT what is good to you. Man’s standards of what is good is corrupt and unjust so by what standard are you measuring that goodness? Jesus is the only man to walk the earth with the same temptations as us and not sin.

The bottom line is we ALL sin and fall short of Gods glorious standards. Oh but Jesus is the piece of the puzzle that connects us back to the hand of our Father. Romans 10:8,9&10 is what it takes to be saved. Admit, Believe, Confess. This was the best thing that I could have ever done for myself and I will never be the same because of the light God continues to shine within me. I am nothing apart from God.

Don’t get caught up into what you think you will lose by accepting Jesus in your life. Look at your life closely and you will see that you really have nothing to lose but everything to gain. It is Gods will that you be safe in His arms when the Lord returns. He wants you to be with Him in now and forever. John 6:40 There is no greater insurance policy in the world.

After you have reflected and examined your life I hope and pray that you are stirred into action to get going now while there is still time. Don’t wait too long. God never pressures us to do anything. He speaks and we should act. The time is NOW Isaiah 55:6

 

Spoken Worship

In the middle of the darkest night wishing to regain my sight

It’s your face that I’m looking for.

When darkness fills the atmosphere and invades my space

It’s still your face that I’m looking for.

My past tried to swallow me whole without apologies just hypocrisy using me as an analogy and even when it follows me

I can’t help but admit that it is your face that I’m looking for.

Slightly convinced that I am not, nor will I ever be, enough or even a little bit of something, something

It’s your face that I’m looking for.

Feelings of overwhelming lack cause my childhood was WACK although I can say that I’m okay with that

It’s still your face that I’m looking for.

Today I am better than I ever imagined I could be, filled with destiny, more than statistics said I’d be

Not close to perfect, His grace I don’t deserve it, I can just get over it how you covered me, moved me, delivered me, saved and loved me. Little old me. Damaged little me. Dirty little ME. I was not good but you were the ONE who wanted me.

Though I may trip and fall as I walk it out and depending on this world fills me with doubt still what’s inside has eventually got to come out more and more and more so I know what I am here for

One thing is for sure…I can’t help but admit that it is your face that I’m looking for.